Who filmed me?!

Shebear29 sent this to my tractor group:


The Mom Song from Northland Video on Vimeo.

Accidental Date Night

So our oldest is visiting his friend in Georgia for the holidays, and the youngest had a spend the night out last night. Plus, Jolly went under the knife yesterday, and was unusually subdued. I looked around and realized we had a mostly empty house and a pack of sleepy dogs, so the hub and I decided to go out to dinner! (Big deal when you've been married 11+ years and seldom spend money on restaurants. We decided to drive down Hendersonville Road and try out the new Stir Fry Cafe across from EarthFare. I had a vague hankering for soup. It turned out to be a really pleasant time. The atmosphere was comfortable, great blues music, very inexpensive, and the food was excellent. I had miso soup and my first Pud Thai. YUM. The hub: hot n sour soup and some spicy thing. Then we wandered around earthfare looking for good tea. We do tend to wander a lot.
I also finished up the chemocap that the hub had asked me to make for his friend's wife. I used a soft cotton Plymouth Jeanne and the pattern for eyelet chemocaps in Knitting for Peace Book. If you try it, use circs. Cotton slides off size 5 dpns like crazycakes.

Talented Friends

look at this awesome thingey that springsteena created!
Slutbanger! LOLLOLLOLLOL

Automatic ^rection

So spacey today! Bad cold. So the hub and I have this running joke about son #2. He has no idea of course, being only 10 and pretty sheltered, but this kid is constantly saying something that could be interpreted in a less than savory way. We call him "the pron king" only switch the letters. Here is this morning's sterling example:

Whole family is chilling in the great room, son #2 is on his computer game and in the relative quiet morning he sings out "It's an automatic errrrrrrectionnnnnnn."

The hub and I look at each other. "Son, what did you just say?" says I.

Again he belts out "It's an automatic erectionnnnnnnnn!"

"Nick, an erect^on is when your penis gets hard. Where did you hear that song?"

Insert entire family snickering and giggling

"From Adam Sandler's Eight Crazy Nights on tv."

Son #3 the knowitall corrects him- "It's ejection, Nick."

A few minutes later... "It's an automatic erectionnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn! oops."

Announcements:

1. I am thinking about doing the Great American Afghan. Anyone interested in a KAL? Cascade 220 or Plymouth Encore?
2. All of the delightful sweethearts from Ravelry keep saying "we should start our own group..."
3. Monday Jolly is going under the knife. His teeny manhood will be stolen by aliens.

Christmas Cuddling

We were not on the naughty list?!

Here's son #1 with his Japanese candy Pocky (thanks Amanda!) and his crazy box of action figures (thanks fairy pugmother!!) but forget the kids, the hub who loves his mustache wax (oh yes I did) and the doggies who ate their turducken (it starts with turd) LOOK at the shiny shiny SWIFT and BALLWINDER!!!! The hub calls it "the spinning wheel of doom"

Happy Solstice and Hanukkah!

We are actually making latkes for dinner, and the hub bought stuff for matzoh ball soup. I guess it is a full-fledged Hebe night. BTW, I'm famous!

And the Winner Is:

thank you to the supremely silly and wonderful people who helped me with the funny captions for the picture contest! There were lots of great entries and since its my blog and my noro I get to pick the winner based on my own sense of oh-hell-that-was-funny-as-crap-ness.
Here are the top 4:

Cristi-Lael said...
Dear Santa:
Been good this year, I have. Deserve lots of presents, I do.

Love,
Yoda

Dear Yoda: You don't get even a candy cane until you learn what a dangling participle is! You're almost as old as I am, man, learn to speak!

Love ,
Santa

(I realize that Yoda is not actually in the picture, but I just got a giggle out of thinking of his Santa letter and couldn't help myself)
(you can give me some Noro for an almost completely unrelated caption. No, you can! I give you permission!)


Jedi Knight confuses Christmas with Cinco de Mao and beats Santa to death thinking he was a pinata.

Oh Puggers pick me, pick me!!
Manitoba *you know I want to, monkey*

Kathleen in Germany said...
Santa: Threaten me all you want, but your Jedi mind tricks and light saber still aren't as scary as the image of me hugging a giant Elvis in a glittery purple jumpsuit!

and my very favorite: Bittlerelly!
and he was all, "dude, it's satan who is on the dark side, i'm santa!!!"

and then alec guinness was all, dude, whatever, dumble, wherez my presents?


So I guess you will get NORO with your weird jelly candy from sweets swap. Rotten girl. Yay!

PS: they moved it to the reindeer, entirely on their own.
Who wants a January random photo caption contest? That was fun!

I am so Mean

This morning I announced that the boys each had to write a report on Winter Solstice before they could get on their computer games.

Fun Friday

Today the puggles were (obviously) traumatized because I was gone all afternoon. I met Lizabee at the coffee place and she knitted and I talked her ear off. Then we went to Purl's and looked at Yarn. (woohoo) I didn't buy any though, and I might end up getting to work for Lindsey! 30% off yarn. (woohoo again)
Then we had a nice lunch and went into this wonderland of stuff called Mast General Store, smack full of old fashioned candy, old timey kids toys, and 50% off all Christmas stuff. I bought a moravian star that holds a votive candle. Even hubby made (fake) appreciative noises. Well it was four bucks!
When I got home I did up a version of the Christmas Rose in purple and cream for a group 30 scarf. I think its my best ever. (woohoo #3)
also cast on today for a blanket-Bob for Manitoba2ct's new grandbaby.

Christmas Dinner in a Can!

Where to even begin. OK, this morning we finally got the little puggle fence put in, and I felt about 200% better just watching my babies cavorting out in the grass. Then some packages arrived. First there was an envelope from Mary, with two skeins of Malabrigo in my very favorite yarn color. There was also a sweet card, which said "May all of your holiday dreams come true", and a gift card to Walmart. Lovely Mary, with her generous heart. It's so funny, isnt it, that every year I let go of more and more expectations out of life, and life just gets better and better so unexpectedly.

The other box I thought was from our fairy pugmother, who has insisted that the boys should get some gifts. But the top of the box had "Turn Up the Funny" on it...hmmmmm. Doesn't sound like fairy pugmother. I opened the box, hands kinda shaking because 1. Generous Mary and 2. Love Surprises and first I saw some potpourri...then a huge crap-ton of prezzies! The one on top said to open now. I think I forgot how to work my camera for a few minutes. Did I mention how much I love surprises?
When I opened it I knew right away- it was from LULU and GRANDPA the cutest puglet in NY! It was a gorgeous handmade ornament in the famous Lulu style! I was so excited. At that point i had put the camera down, to hang the ornament, and then rushed back into the kitchen and lost the camera which was right there in front of me. Surprises=pugger freaks out. OK so there were some prezzies in there for Lizabee and her family too, which I will deliver on Friday. There was a fantastic glamorous photo card of Lulu, Grandpa and Lulu's glam hubby. Also a card telling all about Santas in Iceland- apparently one is called the window peeker (hee!) and there are 13 different ones. They put their shoes out for 13 nights and these prankster Santas fill the shoes with little gifts each of the 13 nights! I love that. Lulu even sent the puggles a Christmas dinner in a can- this dogfood can contains turkey, sweet potatos, beans, apples, etc. so we ALL want to say: THANK YOU to Lulu, Grandpa, and our sweet friend Mary.
Who needs to wish for anything in this world with friends like mine?

Oh My Bob

Holy Crap. I so want this. I really really do. Is that wrong?

Sleeping Jolly

here is my baby boy enjoying his afternoon nap. :)

I look Fabulous, Darling

So I was having a really bad day. Two of the hounds got loose and tried to eat this little puffball dog that was roaming the street. I ran up there trying to catch them and our lovely next door neighbor pops out and started screaming threats and curses at me at the top of her lungs. The little dog was ok, and the guy who owns it was yelling at me too. I HATE being screamed at. But then a friend of mine said that she wanted to help us out with Christmas for the boys, which I tried to tell her no way but she's very stubborn and related to Mother Theresa, so I think my kids might get SOMETHING for Christmas after all. Then to top it off, wonderful Shebear had made me a beautiful shawl as a gift and mailed it mid-November, and we think the post office must have just decided to keep it. We were both bummed, and finally sent bitchy emails, then guess what arrived in my mailbox today! LOOK at how awesome!!! Also there were cute little cupcake magnets and NO, Amandaleigh you cant haz them, and some lion brand cotton yarn! In orange! THANK YOU Shebear!!!! XOX

Now I Have Seen Everything

Look! Santa haz pugs!




And
For those of us who want to give our puggles the very best vino for Christmas?

Today's LOL

How Did I Miss the Fruitcake Catapult???!

Apparently Ashevegas has teh awesome, in the form of a mob of drunken, fruitcake-throwing, bar-hopping Santas each year. Next year I am so there.

For Laughs

Holiday Mayhem and Noro Contest for Nerds

Now we saw some pretty lights and such when we lived in Georgia, but I found a truly horrific awesome tacky light display the other night and my camera just does not do it justice. If you drive from Biltmore Village towards Swannanoa River Rd, like you are going to AC Moore, there is a tiny house on the left up on the hill... It is breathtaking in it's awesome capacity to overwhelm. Son #3 who is a small pessimistic Grinch along the lines of Stewie from Family guy, saw this house, mouth open, jaw dropped in awe. The only thing that couldpossibly top this is Santa hugging a giant Elvis in a purply glitter jumpsuit on my roof. One day...
Also I have posted my new favorite holiday photo of random pop culture creativity in which Santa battles a Jedi. You know, I think whoever posts the best headline for that photo (yep I took the picture) wins a skein of Noro. Seriously. Deadline: Dec 20th.

Vote for me for most pitiful yet cute Christmas Boy

We took a short detour from the budget today. Jolly has had a little stuff in his eye since Wed or so and I took him to see the doc this afternoon. Four meds and a horrible collar later, and visits to two pharmacies... poor lil guy had scratched his eye and its just a good thing Mama was paying attention! Everywhere we went people were turned into puddles of cooing goo. Cool pug superpower!

Colbert- Radical Knitters

I tried to embed this, it is so scary...

Lulu the Knitting Sheep

Tee hee! Made this for Grandma. Of course there are gratuitous puglet pictures...

Kitteh in the Cap Intarsia

A lot of people have been requesting this so I thought I would write it up. All I did was find the picture online, and then I went to this free tool. I loaded thehat picture and printed it, then I used it as a little intarsia chart. I chose orange for the background and did stockinette stitch.

Barbie Tree

Yeah, please excuse the tacky tree but we are stretched pretty tight this year so I broke out the fake tree. Anyway Easter likes it! The fur kids are officially getting along, yay!

Easter Pie

Jolly Bean is beside himself with joy. We have a new little girl and her name is Easter. I call her Easter Pie. She is very very snorty. We picked her up near Lagrange in GA yesterday and I proceeded to drive back to Ashevegas. *HA* Easter does NOT ride in her kennel. She sounds like the Tazmanian Devil on steroids trying to dig through plastic when we put her in there, so son #1 and I spent NINE feverish (both of us are sick) hours playing furry ball toss. Did I mention the 4 hr drive was nine hours? Did I mention the girl baby likes to ping pong back n forth while riding in a car? Thank goodness she is cute.

Burp

i think I'm gonna hurl...

Green Beans and GOAT CHEESE?!

My friend LULU sent Jolly a package the other day with the cutest little drawing on it! Now he has a tiny tent to pee in, apparently.

We had a low key Thanksgiving, went to a church dinner at noon which was mostly normal except for two notable exceptions: AWESOME homemade apple pie made by Lizabee's hubby Rik, and a frightening dish that I was so scared of I took a picture of it.

Afterwards I slept with Jolly on my face then spent Thanksgiving at hospice. We had ice cream. It was a really nice night.

Craft Fair!

Evergreen Community Charter School's
> 4th Annual Holiday Arts and Craft Bazaar
>
> Saturday, December 6th, 10am-4pm
> The bazaar will feature up to 40 local artists exhibiting glass art, woodwork, textiles, collage, handmade toys, dolls, painting, jewelry, blacksmith, photography, food, music, and more, along with crafts created by the school's very own fourth grade class. Come one come all, support local artists, and get your holiday shopping done early. A portion of all proceeds will go towards the fourth grade end of the year school trip. The school is located at 50 Bell Road. Admission is free. For info call (828) 298-2193.
>

Squirrels!

Among other lovely wonderful packages both from Santa and Hreow in Scotland, my sweet friend monkijan sent Jolly his first gifted toy! Now Jan I do tease you for your cute ravetar the squirrel, but how could you possibly know that our yard is the squirrel mecca of North Carolina and that Jolly's new obsession is watching them out of the big window?! Now he haz somehow hunted and caught his very own squeaking one! Thank you so much!

Pug Alert

Jolly is getting used o his new home- today he was chewing on a shoe and we told him no of course, so he waited till we were eating dinner, grabbed the shoe and ran like hell across the house.

I've also gotten word of a four year old baby girl pug in Georgia who's family suddenly decided that three dogs was too many. Her name is Easter and I'm going to pick her up this weekend after Thanksgiving. My intention is to foster her till we can find a good family for her. Hopefully I won't get totally attached. (right)

Whimsy and Eyebrows

For those of you unfamiliar with Son #1, here is a pretty good snapshot of his delightful personality...
I gave him a toy catalog yesterday to circle things that he might be interested in obtaining for Christmas.
Awhile later, he casually handed it back and said "Mama will you look at the catalog?" about ninety times.
Finally I looked at it. No longer a toy catalog, first I thought "my goodness are the children cartoons? From Kazistan? Monobrows are in?" then I saw the pony smoking a cigar. Hmmmm, I don't think JC Penny could get away with that, even in North Carolina.
I turned back to the front cover, where he had crossed out the word "Toy" and substituted "eyebrow".

Woot! The Eyebrow Catalog! Complete with Scary kids in expensive vehicles and smoking ponies!

I just love my kids.

Boots in Yarn

In a loving gesture, my Ravelry friend Lulu (Grandma) and her beautiful darling boy have sent us the sweetest angel love pug. Isn't he wonderful? Thank you so much, Lulu. Everyone here thinks this knitted pug is Boots. Just beautiful.